"I Can't believe I ever dated him."
This, is what I over heard on the Skytrain the other day on my way to work. Immersed in The Sirens of Titan by Kurt Vonnegut, this one little sentence manage to pull me out of some great fiction. I continued to listen as the Woman went on to list all the things this man "she was to good for" lacked.
This list was very extensive.
Still it got me thinking and I came to the realization that I have had many people in my life, including myself, use this line or some variation of it.
"I can't believe I dated her/where friends/where together?" You can add the ever popular "what was I thinking?" to the mix.
I had to understand why I would ever open my mouth and say any of these silly lines. It was time for me to take responsibility. I have said to many of my friends, and mentioned it a few times in my Blog that the world is a reflection of you. You are at the very lest a Co-create on this wonderful journey you have chosen, so you must honor your choices. Take a moment and think about all of your relationships regardless of whatever state they are in. Now accept to yourself that you have made these choices, all of them, and BELIEVE in them. Now some people may say, wait I didn't choice to be given up on, or used, or cheated on, or any other negative situation or circumstance you can think of. However in some weird way you did. You needed to learn. You had to grow. These people that we end up becoming "to good for" in essence are very much us. IF you sit and think about you and who you were 5 or 10 years ago you will clearly be different and if you go " I can't believe.. blah blah blah" Shut your mouth and respect yourself. Believe you have grown and Believe where that growth came from. These lovely people that you became "to good for" did nothing that you can not over come. Don't let fear and hate stop you. When you list there short comings remember that some of the qualities exist in you or did at one point in time.
And if by chance you are the one who let someone down, broke a heart, took someone for granted. Accept your choices and thank you for hurting someone, thank you for hurting yourself. Those people were and are the great aspects of you, that you were not ready for. So you hurt yourself by hurting them. I personally forgive anyone who has done this to me and ask for forgiveness if I have done any harm to anyone.
We all are good enough and can all become better. And for those still looking for there great soul mate or love to complete them (which is entirely different blog) I say, The best relationships you can have is with yourself first and when you love you. The world will say to you in many voices or in one. I love you too. Now that is something you should Believe.
Thursday, August 23, 2012
Sunday, August 12, 2012
All I do is Party?
As I walked down Granville Street last night completely sober and foolishly acting all high and mighty.
I started to think about Drugs. I looked around at the Men and Women or Boys and Girls. I mean Reaaally looked at them. Some of them where clearly smashed out of there minds. I saw a very many girls either sitting on a bench or leaning on a lamp post drinking water trying to keep there shit together(so many dresses ruined). Men or Boys with that dear in head lights look, and lets not forget the Men who become the incredible Hulk when they drink. Then there are all the lovers new and old holding on to each other. The Boys with that look of, "I'm so going to get laid tonight" The Girls thinkin," I hope he likes me, or I really just wanna eat my pizza and go to bed"
As I walk to the Roxy (your read correctly) looking around I almost made the mistake of thinking I was better then everyone. Then I told my Ego to Shut the hell up.
Again I started to think about Drugs, Alcohol being the main one, and I realized that everyone around me is being exactly who they really are... in a way.
When I first started drinking I was told you drink to loosen up, to grow some balls to hit on that women that your Ego says is out of your league. To have Fun!!
However, it has become more apparent to me that we take Drugs such as Alcohol, Cannabis, Mushrooms, MDMA, DMT not to have fun but to shut down our Ego.
That voice that says you can't do that, or She/He is to good for you, that's not you, and basically anything else you say to yourself to hold yourself back.
Of course because we live in an Age of Abundance. Everything is Accessible and we over do it. We depend on these gifts from the earth and begin to hinder our own gifts within us. Yup, came to the realization on Granville St.
I'm not going to be silly and say don't do Drugs etc, but I will say you must learn to honor yourself. Yes maybe you need to over do it to learn, but respect yourself and learn. If you do drink or take drugs understand it only enhances what you already have. It's not the 12 shots or pills or joint or anything that made you have fun last night. It was you. You pushed through your Ego and found your true essence, but that awesome You already lives inside you. You don't need to be drugged up all the time to find yourself or take copious amounts of anything to be you. IF you think everyone does it and you should to. Well, everyone does it because you do. (think about it)
Also any Drug (Medicine) that comes from the Earth has far more power then we allow ourselves to believe. They are not simply for Fun. You should learn to honor them because they can teach you how to be Awesome all the time. Without reaching for that extra drink. So the next time you are out and you feel really good let yourself be in that moment don't push it. Ask yourself is this Me? Believe me I have partied, in many cases in life I am the Party, but the greatest nights of my life I remember.
Learn. Live. Love.
I started to think about Drugs. I looked around at the Men and Women or Boys and Girls. I mean Reaaally looked at them. Some of them where clearly smashed out of there minds. I saw a very many girls either sitting on a bench or leaning on a lamp post drinking water trying to keep there shit together(so many dresses ruined). Men or Boys with that dear in head lights look, and lets not forget the Men who become the incredible Hulk when they drink. Then there are all the lovers new and old holding on to each other. The Boys with that look of, "I'm so going to get laid tonight" The Girls thinkin," I hope he likes me, or I really just wanna eat my pizza and go to bed"
As I walk to the Roxy (your read correctly) looking around I almost made the mistake of thinking I was better then everyone. Then I told my Ego to Shut the hell up.
Again I started to think about Drugs, Alcohol being the main one, and I realized that everyone around me is being exactly who they really are... in a way.
When I first started drinking I was told you drink to loosen up, to grow some balls to hit on that women that your Ego says is out of your league. To have Fun!!
However, it has become more apparent to me that we take Drugs such as Alcohol, Cannabis, Mushrooms, MDMA, DMT not to have fun but to shut down our Ego.
That voice that says you can't do that, or She/He is to good for you, that's not you, and basically anything else you say to yourself to hold yourself back.
Of course because we live in an Age of Abundance. Everything is Accessible and we over do it. We depend on these gifts from the earth and begin to hinder our own gifts within us. Yup, came to the realization on Granville St.
I'm not going to be silly and say don't do Drugs etc, but I will say you must learn to honor yourself. Yes maybe you need to over do it to learn, but respect yourself and learn. If you do drink or take drugs understand it only enhances what you already have. It's not the 12 shots or pills or joint or anything that made you have fun last night. It was you. You pushed through your Ego and found your true essence, but that awesome You already lives inside you. You don't need to be drugged up all the time to find yourself or take copious amounts of anything to be you. IF you think everyone does it and you should to. Well, everyone does it because you do. (think about it)
Also any Drug (Medicine) that comes from the Earth has far more power then we allow ourselves to believe. They are not simply for Fun. You should learn to honor them because they can teach you how to be Awesome all the time. Without reaching for that extra drink. So the next time you are out and you feel really good let yourself be in that moment don't push it. Ask yourself is this Me? Believe me I have partied, in many cases in life I am the Party, but the greatest nights of my life I remember.
Learn. Live. Love.
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